Stacey Dash Promotes F*cking on the First Date
Stacey Dash stopped by Jamie Foxx’s show, The Foxxhole, where she talked about f*cking on the first date. Dash states that she wants to find out up front if the sex is bad and if it is, she BOUNCES! Wow! Never heard a female (celebrity) openly speak on this.
This brings me to my question: Do you guys think that a woman is still respected if she has the same attitude that Stacey has? I know that there is a HUGE double standard regarding women and waiting. Additionally, if you think that f*cking on the first date is wrong, do you put a time frame on WHEN you do the horizontal two step? How long? I’d especially love to hear from my male readers on this one!
March 10th, 2010 at 3:30 pm
I've never put a time limit on when to sleep with some1. If i'm feeling you then, it happens. I don't try to rush it or limit it.
March 10th, 2010 at 3:38 pm
I dont put a time limit on it either. But i DID try that NO STRINGS ATTACHED situation once, & i can honestly say it is NOT 4 me! So i definetly think feelings have to be in order for me to sleep with a guy, but not all females think as such , & some are comfortable enough to have sex on the 1st day, i judge NO1 cause i have realized everyone reacts differently to certain situations!
March 10th, 2010 at 10:52 am
I don’t really know how long but def. never happening on the first date. I require STD paper results before any sexual encounter. If I can’t get that then it’s a total no go on all accounts.
March 10th, 2010 at 10:55 am
I have been in situation where I used a guy for sex on the first date and never called him back the next day. The sex wasn’t bad, I just didn’t feel like having a relationship with this man. Well he kept calling my phone, blowing my Facebook inbox, so i finally told him where i was standing. And immediately i was labeled as a player, nobody will ever take me seriously, and I am not a wife material. Man feel dumb when they get played, or are used as sexual objects and the only way to redeem themselves is to start calling names since their ego is a little hurt. Sad but that’s the world we live in.
March 10th, 2010 at 4:11 pm
i agree with you .. 100% especially in this day and age. i think sometimes that whole rushing to sex can have a nice black-lash on people sometimes .. because the sex may be great but personality could suck .. i guess that why people would stay and sometimes not leave
March 10th, 2010 at 4:17 pm
Sooo, obviously sleeping with someone on the first date and marrying them isn't working out…
I'm a southern girl, so I was (raised) to not give up the good good until there's a ring on my finger. I said raised, but uh yeah, I surely AM NOT marrying someone without knowing they're adequate.
For me personally, I wait at least three months. I think sometimes guys may get the wrong impression if you give it up on the first date, then they'll just see you as an automatic booty call not relationship material.
March 10th, 2010 at 4:24 pm
If you're an adult and you pay your own bills, you can do whatever you'd like… However, I think sleeping with someone on the first date is reckless on both sides, period.
I was actually having a conversation about this the other night with a male friend of mine and he told me that he doesn't feel like a woman who will sleep with him on the first date is loose, but he doesn't automatically think of her as being wife or long-term relationship material. He can hang out with her, they can kick it, and have sex… But that's as far as it'll go. He said he'd like for his woman to have more self-respect than that.
With that said, I wouldn't have sex on the first date. I don't have go by a plan nor do I follow any rules, I go by what feels right to me and sex on the first night isn't one of them. I also realized that I hold women to a higher standard than I do men, and I guess it's because my grandmother played a huge role in my life and having sex with just any ol' dude isn't exactly lady-like. Also, I was taught that women have the power in most relationships… You just need to learn how to use it.
People just need to do whatever is going to make them happy, period.
March 10th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
I think people need to do what's right for them and STOP putting their sex life out into public forum. What ever happened to modesty and keeping your private business private?
March 10th, 2010 at 5:00 pm
I totally hate the idea of sleeping with someone on the first date and then saying you wouldn't be with them because they have no self respect. My whole thing is, Weren't you there too? What makes you better than them? You f*cked on the first day with them too.
If they have no self respect, you don't either. If they are loose, so are you.
And I agree with Ms. Devinia!
March 10th, 2010 at 5:10 pm
Attention: Stacey Dash is actually promoting the FUCKERY destroying young black women today. Too worried about finding men who can please their pussies, instead of finding men who can please them, give them stability, and offer them long term happiness. That's why tons of black women are unmarried with OOW babies, feeling bitter and disillusioned. They are simply becoming sperm receptacles for bad boys who are good in bed, while good men move onto more sensible women. Perhaps if Stacey hadn't spread her legs on the first date, she wouldn't have been divorced so many times. Good sex is not the end all and be all of good relationships.
March 10th, 2010 at 5:19 pm
100& Co-sign
A man could be great at making her come, but what else is he offering her? I'm not judging her but that kind of thinking will turn a woman into a jump off. There are double standards with men and women's sexuality. That won't change. I once saw a bunch of black women on the Tyra Show explaining their reasons for being single. One had the nerve to say that decent good guys are bad in bed. Well she got what she wanted. A broke, uneducated, deadbeat baby daddy. But at least the sex was good from date #1 smh
March 10th, 2010 at 5:22 pm
Havign numerous male friends, and 5 brothers, it don't matter if you make the man wait 4-5 month or even a year. Men know they want to be with you the moment they have a conversation with you. Men go after a career driven, goal oriented woman. Good sex is extra. You can have the best P***** in the world, but if all you do is procrastinate, have no goal in life, still have the same position you had 3 years ago, you best believe you will only be good for sex. Man want a challenge that's true, and that challenge is keeping up with a successful woman. Not trying to see when he will hit it.
March 10th, 2010 at 5:24 pm
Stacey Dash has been married and divorced several times. I will NOT take advice from her. Just like I will not take advice about parenting or staying skinny from Oprah. NEXT!!
March 10th, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Not all men are like that. Some men think they want a career driven, goal oriented women until that woman starts to surpass them in those areas. When women go around sleeping with men on the first date, they run the risk of becoming jump offs. Stacey Dash has been married and divorced several times, so I doubt rushing to open her legs helped her out.
March 10th, 2010 at 5:42 pm
I feel that sex ruins things, you can turn away a good man just because his 'sex game is wack' however you can work with him…teach him things and teach each other. However sex on the first date is reckless you don't know anything about this person's sexual history or last check up but I do not put a limit on when to get it in, it just happens for me.
March 10th, 2010 at 7:15 pm
Having sex on the first date isn't wrong, but you've got to know the game that you're playing. If you have sex right away, then you aren't on a track to build a relationship with that person. Folks out for sex have it and keep it moving. The folks who worry about the early sex issue are the ones who want a relationship but keep messing up 'cause they think sex can jump start a relationship.
Yes, there are women who can have sex like men and get respect. But those same women don't care about being respected. But, if a person is pressed about how their sexual behavior garners them respect, then its an almost sure bet that they are engaging in behavior that is disrespectful.
March 10th, 2010 at 8:37 pm
Yes, THIS is the absolute reason why so many black women are unmarried with babies. You just sound stupid. No cosign on this shit. You have turned a societal and cultural issue into some one-thought Maury bullshit. Please do not diminish this issue any further with your thoughts. Good grief.
March 10th, 2010 at 8:38 pm
THIS. You don't know peoples lives. I think men know what the hell they want when they want it, all bs aside. Having sex with him today, tomorrow or a year from now may not change his thinking at all.
March 10th, 2010 at 8:40 pm
She's been divorced all those times because she's fucking on the first date. Yep, that is exactly it. It seems to me that since she's been married multiple times that she has probably gotten to the "goal" more than some others on this site. That is if marriage is the "goal" you're looking for.
Who knows why she got divorced? Obviously fucking on the first date didn't deter her last couple of husbands.
March 10th, 2010 at 8:41 pm
I have to disagree. It all depends. I know people who did just this "disrespectful" thing and they are married to this day. So what does that say about them?
March 10th, 2010 at 9:37 pm
Isn't staying married the point? Clearly her pussy didn't help her keep her husbands. This posting should have been titled "Stacey Dash Promotes Fucking on the First Date to Get Marriage Proposals Quickly Followed by Divorce Settlements"
March 10th, 2010 at 9:45 pm
Cosign, Cosign, Cosign!
March 10th, 2010 at 9:46 pm
You seem to be very argumentative. Everybody is entitled to their opinion. Isn't STAYING married the goal? This post should have actually been titled "Stacey Dash Promotes F*cking on the First Date to Get Marriage Proposals" *followed by divorce settlements* according to your line of thinking.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:47 pm
tell em Jasmine.LOL. I have to agree with you. It's 2010 and people still wanna act like sleeping on the first date is a crime.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:49 pm
Too bad Stacey can't promote staying married. It's something she can't seem to do.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:51 pm
HOT D*MN!!!!!!!
YOU HIT THE NAIL "EXXXXXXXACTLY" ON THE HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
COSIGN 1000%!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
March 10th, 2010 at 9:54 pm
I'm in total agreeance with everything you said. I find that having sex too early in the relationship becomes a distraction and it damages things usually. Whether the sex was good or bad, I kind of find myself either uninterested or too interested because of it.
March 10th, 2010 at 4:59 pm
I think that a woman shud wait at least 4-6wks b4 sleeping with sum1. I feel that the guy loses respect for u if you give it up too fast. With women outnumbering men, men can get sex from almost anyone (White, Black, Latino, Asian, etc…) & anywhere. What makes you different? What makes YOU stand out?
Men LUV a challenge. They want to have the pleasure of hunting you, they love that chase.
It doesnt surprise me that the marriages didnt last long & didnt work. It seems they were based off sex NOT emotional/mental/spiritual compatibility.
March 10th, 2010 at 5:13 pm
I don't believe in having sex on the first date if you are looking for a relationship. If you are just trying to get yours and move on…then do you. But if you think that you want to pursue a relationship then I don't believe in doing it. Here is why:
1. As "enlightened" as people claim to be they still blame the woman for sex. It doesn't matter that the guy was there."Men are dogs" so of course they will have sex with you. They say "where is her self respect" "no man will ever respect her".
2. Everyone wants a challenge. If you will sleep with a guy on the first date then he has "conquered" and now he is moving on. There is no reason to get to know you better because he as gotten what he wanted. And most guys feel like if you will sleep with them on the first date then you will sleep with anyone.
3.I believe if you rush anything to fast it has more potential to damage a relationship. Have you ever had someone try to rush you emotionally? They want you to love them "right at that second". It makes most of us feel uncomfortable.
So I think that women should wait a few months to protect themselves. Because most women can't have sex on the first date and not become emotionally attached. We all have female friends that have this problem. The second that they sleep with the guy they are in love.
March 10th, 2010 at 10:16 pm
i cosign on that that gets me mad guys could do the player thing but females cant when will that stop
March 10th, 2010 at 11:25 pm
people actually listen to this foolishness
March 11th, 2010 at 12:02 am
That is her business if she's doing this…I probably wouldn't tell anyone though. Maybe she just loves sex…who knows. Wish I could gat a date though! lol
March 11th, 2010 at 12:12 am
Right?!
Anyone can get it wrong, but can we get someone on the mic who got it right? I'm so sick and tired of props and attention going to folks who are f*ckin' up. Can the f*ck ups go to the back of the line and try again?
Thankee vera muchhhhh!
March 11th, 2010 at 12:14 am
And THAT'S what I'm saying Jasmine. You don't care about what others think, so the "Should I or shouldn't I?" doesn't apply to you. If somebody thinks yous a hoe, does it matter? No!
BTW, condoms don't always work. You didn't say so, but there are folks who figure "I used a condom" is all she wrote.
March 11th, 2010 at 12:17 am
It ain't a crime, but it sho ain't keeping Gladys clean and fresh either to hit, change ya mind, then quit. Depending on the d*ck count that there could end up being a well used, punched out, blown out, loose as all get out, puss puss.
I ain't against people doing them, but I'm just saying… LOL
March 11th, 2010 at 1:16 am
Of-course women won't be respected, because of the huge double standard that floats in society. I mean, I don't see what's wrong if women adopted the same livelihood as a man. If she wants to fukk a man on the 1st date, then bounce, so what. Guys do it all the time, so what's wrong with a woman doing it? Fukk double standards. Live your life. I'm just glad she's being open & honest about her situation, but 3 marriages? Something's wrong, but not really. Everyone learns different things in new relationships, so she probably grew out of all these times.
March 11th, 2010 at 1:23 am
Oddly enough, my current gf and I did do the deed on our first date. Maybe I'm different than most of the fellas because I didn't value her any less. Perhaps the fact that we talked to each other and started to get to know eachother before we had that first date helped. It wasn't like something that was planned but the vibe led to that and we've been happy physically and relationship wise ever since. Now that might be the exception and not the rule.
In general, I would probably advise women to take their time and get to know a fella before they have sex. There is no set number but get to know the dude enough before you engage in something that serious. Sure they'll entertain you sexually but it would be hard for them to see you as anything more. Now if thats what you want then cool. Just know that it could potentially stall a real substantive relationship from forming.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:08 pm
As long as we are using condoms, I don't see the problem. People kill me with the whole notion that having sex on the first date is taboo. I'm a grown woman, no kids, my own place and own car. If I'm feeling the situation right there and then, then why not. I'm careful who I date anyway, so wouldn't have be careful who I sleep with. Whether it be the first date or 15th.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:31 pm
SOMEBODY touched a nerve LOL. Every person is entitled to their opinion. You don't have to like it The truth hurts. A lot of black women value sex before monogamy & marriage. If they aren't doing that, they create these ridiculously high standards for potential mates. 42% unmarried isn't just down to black men being "uneducated, in prison, on the down low" blah blah blah. That's a fallacy.
March 10th, 2010 at 9:58 pm
@rhia,
COSIGN….
Sad, but (UNFORTUNATELY) true, so….
COSIGN!
March 10th, 2010 at 10:12 pm
dam 3 months so what if u feeling the guy waited 3 months n the sex was wack wat u do then??????? shyt i would of had said at least the 4th date or something like that lol thats just me
March 10th, 2010 at 11:30 pm
I don’t think there should be a time limit. I just think women have be in the right mind set to have casual sex. Most women aren’t going to do what Stacey is doing… have good sex and instantly snag a husband. That’s what NOT to do if you want a serious relationship, and as others have said, it hasn’t exactly worked out for her. However, if you understand that sex is sex, go for it. Just be safe with your body and your heart.
March 11th, 2010 at 12:09 am
It says that they are the exception to the rule. For every one of them there's 10 men and women who hit the sheets in love and woke up the next morning to "just another one night stand".
Oh, and you didn't say so, but lets be clear that just 'cause folks engage in long term f*ckery does not mean they are in a relationship. Now I'VE seen that too. He came back for seconds and she thinks he's into more than just her punnani.
March 11th, 2010 at 12:16 am
Well apparently, fucking on the first date has worked against her, because she can't seem to stay married. But Stacey is old enough now to decide how sexually inhibited she want to be, and live her life as such. I agree with hmmm: if you're looking to forge a relationship, sex on the first date may not be the way to go. You've already given it up from jump; where the hell else are you supposed to go from there?
March 11th, 2010 at 1:36 am
I get a kick out of double standards because we all pick and choose which double standards are ok and which ones are unfair. I'm sure most women feel that a guy should pay or that a man should perform certain functions and tasks. But isn't that a double standard in and of itself. Regardless of that, the double standards won't change because they are reinforced in every generation and are based on society.
The double standard looms large in these situations because in the minds of most people, women ultimately hold the key to sex. Unless they allow us in, we ain't even getting a glimpse of the kitty. So thats part of the reason why women are looked at harshly for being promiscuous. Yall are the "guardians of chastity" lol. It don't go down unless yall say so. Just look how we are referring to the act of sex on the female's end. Females are the ones who are "giving it up". As such, society will always place more superficial responsibilty on your shoulders as far as sex goes. Blame it on our physiological differences for part of this double standard.
March 11th, 2010 at 1:38 am
One more thing, just because many guys celebrate the promiscuous man, doesn't necessarily mean that its the desirable thing or virtuous thing to do. I'm not promoting or knocking it but I do know many women and men who frown upon males who are sowing wild oats. I'm just saying a woman's rationale for it shouldn't be in any way related to "doing what the guys do".
March 11th, 2010 at 2:36 am
I don't think it's a bad idea, per se, but I believe that a woman who thinks that after giving it up on the first date, it'll be like nothing happened the morning after is in denial. Men cannot go backwards sexually (Copyright: Chris Rock) and I think giving it up on the first date to a man who you want to potentially boo up with is foolish. Men need time to add qualities to their mental pictures of women and once they hit, they're usually done developing their idea of you. So if you let him get it on the first date, all he'll have to reference you to is your sex game and that's how you get sidelined for actual wifey material.
But if you're just in it for the long and strong or the cut buddies situation, by all means, hop on and ride it out lol
March 11th, 2010 at 8:44 am
I guess she's not looking to get married again.
March 11th, 2010 at 3:15 pm
I think this shows that she doesn't respect herself nor does she value sex the way it should be. Also this is a rebellious time for the world. People have lost respect for love and like the bible says the hearts of men have waxed cold. Don't get me wrong this is good entertainment but lets be real people this is a show. Please don't base your personal actions on the lifestyles and philosophies of these phony and insecure celebrities. Stacey is fine to look at but not really wifey material and to be honest any girl that carries themselves the way she does isn't marraige material either. One love peeps. Stay beautiful my black sisters.
March 11th, 2010 at 3:15 pm
To me it shouldn't be about "living like men", because there are people out there who don't think its right for men to just to sex women and bounce. I can't knock or promote it but I just want women to understand the situation. If its a dude you think you would like to build more with, you might want to wait and get to know the guy. If its just a smash and bounce and you both are down for it then go ahead.
And the double standard is in place because women are the ones who "give it up" so a lot of people feel that women have the power over whether sex happens or not. Otherwise its called rape.
March 11th, 2010 at 10:57 am
I AM A PERSON THAT HAS HAD SEX ON THE FIRST DATE BEFORE…HOWEVER, I STILL GOT RESPECT BECAUSE I AM A WOMAN WHO RESPECT MYSELF.
HOWEVER THE TIME I DID HAVE SEX ON THE FIRST DATE…TURNED INTO THE GUY BEING MY BOYFRIEND FOR 7 YRS. YES, HAVING SEX THE FIRST NIGHT IS NOT ALWAYS GOOD FOR SOME BUT YOU ALSO KNOW THE KIND OF MAN OR WOMAN YOU ARE DEALING WITH BEFORE U SLEEP WITH THEM THAT NIGHT. (IF THERE WAS ANY REAL CONVERSATION.
WOMEN / MEN ARE JUMPOFFS IF ALL YOUR CONVERSATION IS ABOUT SEX. IF ON THE FIRST NIGHT BEFORE THE SEX YOU LET A MAN/WOMAN CALL YOU ANY NAME THEY WANT (LIKE BI*TCH OR MY HOE) THEN OF COURSE YOU WILL NOT BE RESPECTED. IF YOU SHOW ANY CLASS AND TELL THE PERSON YOUR ON A DATE WITH WHERE YOU STAND (LIKE YOUR LIKES AND DISLIKES) THEN YOU WILL BE RESPECTED BECAUSE THAT PERSON WILL KNOW HOW FAR TO GO.
IN MY SITUATION…I WAS IN LAW SCHOOL, AND THE GUY I WAS DATING AT THE TIME WAS A SCHOOL TEACHER AND HAS A DEGREE IN CONSTRUCTION. WE HAD SEX THE FIRST NIGHT BECAUSE WE WERE FEELING EACH OTHER THAT MUCH. BOTH HAD GOALS AND BOTH WAS CURRENTLY WORKING AND HAD OUR OWN. WE FELL IN LOVE OUT OF INTEREST IN EACH OTHER LIVES.
SOMETIMES IT CAN WORK…IF YOU KNOW HOW THE PERSON IS FEELING, OR FEEL ABOUT YOU. BUT IF YOU ARE LOOKIN G TO SLEEP WITH EVERY MAN/WOMAN THAT SAYS HI THEN OF COURSE THATS TROUBLE/DRAMA!
NOT AN THERAPIST! JUST SAYIN!!!
4RM THA QUEEN
March 11th, 2010 at 9:33 pm
lol so didnt she learn after the 2nd marriage
March 13th, 2010 at 9:27 pm
Anybody ever heard of gonorrhea? Chlamydia? Syphilis? Those are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to sexually transmitted diseases.
What about getting tested BEFORE jumping into bed together? That to me is A MUST! I refuse to disrespect myself like that, and NOT get tested before getting down.
March 15th, 2010 at 2:44 am
I fukked the shit outta my man on our first date, and we've been married for 8 years. You're grown do what you want. Just make sure he wraps it up.
April 1st, 2010 at 3:01 am
Typical sellout, White Man Cum Bucket slut b!tch.. I wonder how many White Men Stacey laid back on the casting couch and open up her legs for during her lackluster career.. Fuck this SELLOUT WHORE..