January 6th, 2010 by Miss Jia || Filed Under: Love, Miss Jia
Dear Kid Cudi,
I received this pic a couple days ago and wasn’t gonna say anything. But now that this pic has somehow found its way back to me (thanks @ThisIsJanero), I feel that it’s absolutely necessary to let you know one thing…you ain’t from Scotland. You ain’t Irish. So your little fashion statement’s only purpose is a plea for glitter. Stand back while I sprinkle.
Although I am a bit miffed by the whole skinny jeans epidemic (because some people…including YOU…take sh*t a little bit too far), I wanted to be the first one to personally thank you for showing the kids that it’s okay to break away from the jeans where you can see your heart beating through your balls and simply let your nuts hang. I guess…
Love,
Miss Jia
There’s a whole lotta glitter on that there stage. You guys can catch Cudi’s performance with John Legend below. I really hope that this style doesn’t catch on. Really…
Dear Trey Songz,
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for featuring a beautiful brown skinned model who appears to have NATURAL, BEAUTIFUL hair in your upcoming video, Invented Sex! Love you for that! I’m sure that in addition to helping to instill some pride in some of the natural chicas of the world, you’ll also make many women’s (and men’s) loins swell with lustful thoughts and delight at the finished product. Yes indeed!
Dear BSB,
So, I am online, minding my business & playing Literati on a Friday (because I have NO life) when I receive a message from one of my followers on Twitter stating that you guys somehow thought that it was a good idea to remake my ABSOLUTE MOST FAVORITE SONG EVER, Don’t Disturb This Groove by The System.
I should hire somebody to send the WHOLE GROUP a package of swine flu for that sh*t! Listen, there are two things that in life that, according to yours truly, should never EVER be remade:
1. ANY Michael Jackson song (I don’t give a damn HOW talented you think you are, the King of Pop’s music should NEVER be touched) and
2. Don’t Disturb This Groove
You guys sound a sh*tty mess and I’m being generous in my statement. I am writing Youtube a separate letter asking that they REMOVE all forms of this remake, as it violates peen-al code #Jia-091296959. Don’t take it personal…
Sending roundhouse kicks to the vocal chords & balls,
What in the hell? WHO approved this look? Surely you did not co-sign the idea with 20/20 vision. And here I thought that I could properly divide my glitter THREE ways between your red panty draws wearing brother, Spectangular*, the twig & berry show off, Slick ‘Em**, or even the EXTRA suspect name having member, Lingerie,…but honey, you’re clearly more deserving. WOW! *throws rainbow colored glitter* That is ALL!
